Welcome to another episode of weekly chit-chats! In case you don’t know yet, chit-chat is our mid-week break from the monotony that is makeup. It’s when you and I talk about something else- from the most mundane to downright idiotic, haha! In short, it’s when you and I descend to planet earth and talk like normal human beings. But before anything else, let me just say that I am in cloud nine right now. Reason being, weekly chit-chat generated more traffic than I initially thought! Hugs to you ladies who comment, stumble, tweet, and share my posts.
So it’s selfie time ladies and gents! If you have Instagram, you exactly know what I mean. No Instagram? who cares. Unless you live in the boondocks, selfie is the most used and abused word in recent times. Simply put, it’s a photo of yourself taken by yourself, with the intent of sharing it in social media. Old- school instagrammers complain that what used to be a virtual platform for sharing breathtaking photos is now replaced with same-shit-different-day self-absorbed people. So is selfie akin to being selfish and narcissistic? While I certainly don’t post pic after pic of the same angle of the same background, I like taking selfies and I enjoy looking at yours. But c’mon, let’s be real. There are those that make me scream enough is enough! So in no random order, here are photos you need to stop posting or else…
(1) Duck Face. It makes me cringe when I see your face duck after duck after duck, waddafuq. I get it, you have sexy lips and kissing me virtually fulfill your fantasy that (1) I am your fan (2) you are cute. Enough of the fake kisses. I can tolerate one or two duck face and please roll it out in between ten photos or so. And by the way, in case you don’t know yet, duck face is so passé. Have you heard of sparrow? it’s a new selfie craze in Japan. Just open your eyes wide and pucker your lips like a baby bird waiting to be fed. Okay, I had to practice several times but here’s my wacky rendition nonetheless…
(2) OOTD a.k.a Outfit of the Day for every place and occasion. Yikes, I’m guilty here! I wear scrubs everyday so every little chance I get to doll up sounds fun. Aim, click, upload. But see unless you run a fashion blog or a you’re a model building your portfolio, I don’t need to see every outfit you wear to every occasion you attend. Gurl are you serious? “see my church #ootd”; I tell you what, I’m sure God wouldn’t mind even if you wear your ugly reindeer sweater, duh?! And there are more…. what I wore to funeral #ootd”, “my water broke #ootd”, “I’m bored as hell #ootd , I’m at Walmart #ootd . With that said, I promise I won’t annoy you with every frickin’ OOTD post, with a few exceptions of course.
(3) Bathroom selfies. Okay I laughed real hard when I saw this photo on Facebook. How can you not?
Tell me, what’s the fascination with bathroom selfies? great lighting? nice cubicle? This generation has gone overboard *smh*
(4) Gym selfies. I don’t go to the gym but occasionally I take selfies when I’m exercising, drenched in sweat. Why? because it motivates me when I see myself from the mirror. Absurd I know but we have our own little ways when it comes to self-affirmation. But what I’m saying here is when you post your abs, biceps and butt excessively on Instagram, it becomes absolute annoyance. Like do you ever eat at all girl? Or better yet, do you have other things to do besides going to the gym?
Now that you know what annoys me on Instagram and I know for a fact that you will continue to post whatever pleases you….Tell me, is selfie a bane to human existence? One thing for sure, if somebody irritates you to the bone, click unfollow. That’s one less headache to deal with.
It’s your turn. What’s your Instagram pet peeve?