Wednesday, February 12, 2014

The Truth Behind Showing Vs. Showing Off

Welcome to our weekly chit-chat ladies. If you're new to TheFabZilla, weekly chit-chat is my mid-week break from reviews and whatnots. It's when you and I get to be human and talk about something else; after all we have lives outside makeup and nail polish, right?  Today we will tackle a rather touchy subject because everyone is guilty as charged, don't deny.


Yes, we all love to show. Whether it's a new makeup, new boyfriend, new car, new house, new TV, new iPad, new bag, new oven, new shoes, new puppy, even new boobs, by instinct we all love to show. We show because (1) we are happy (2) we are proud of our achievements (3) we want to inform, even if sometimes they don't make sense. It's a universal mentality because no matter where you're from, there is that someone who loves to show.

Then of course, we also love to watch. See your friend's house, see who she's dating, see what kind of exercise she's doing, see what's inside her makeup bag, see if she got a new job, or see if she's divorcing her philandering husband. That interest to "see" what's going on the other side of the fence is also a universal mentality. It's called curiosity, and we have Adam and Eve to blame for (deym for eating the forbidden fruit!)

nouveau riche marketing, what is nouveau rich

But who cares if we love to show? Is there something wrong about it? What differentiates showing from showing off?

Welcome to Generation Y, the peak of social media madness; where showing means welcoming strangers, stalkers and morons to your bedroom; where showing means over-sharing your lifestyle to the interwebz; where showing means "I'm better than most of you, idiots". What used to be shared to a select few is replaced with mindless over-sharing of every piece of shi+ you own on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. Then you cry and complain of invasion of privacy. Gurl, you insane in the membrane?

I said it's a touchy subject because I'm a classic example. As a beauty blogger on the side, I show you my makeup stash by way of photos and reviews. I have my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram where I share personal stuff albeit selectively. See I'm not here to speak from a "holier-than-thou" stance, it's hypocritical. But I tell you what, the next time you overwhelm my Facebook feeds with ostentatious gifts from your annoying husband, or you complain of too much money spent on buying designer bags, or constantly posing beside your Ferrari or Benz, I will treat you like a lowly fungus crying for human's attention. I love to watch you my friend but sadly not too much. 'Got no patience for show-off.



The rise of nouveau rich a.k.a peddlers of good life. Nouveau riche is a marketer's goldmine. They're the newly-rich living la vida loca. According to PBS Hawaii reportage, this segment comprises 40% of total US consumer spending or roughly 25 million households. These are the men and women that flash their posh condos, LVs or Hermes Birkin in social media, including that lowly fungus who loves to pose beside her/his expensive cars. But let's admit it, even if they annoy us with their vulgarity, at some point we all aspire to live the luxe life. They are what we call aspirational.

Pissed-off with the show-off? Disconnect.
That's exactly what I did with some fungi in my life.
Now I can breathe better, haha!

What say you?

Kathryne

37 comments:

  1. Ha ha! I feel you and then some! The option to unclick "Show in News Feed" on FB is a life saver!

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    1. Yes, that's what I do too! Thanks God for hide feed, haha!

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  2. While I don't know anyone who owns an Hermes scarf or Birkin bag, I get the gist! It's an impossible line to walk, really - no matter what you do, there will be haters! I think that if you know in your heart who you are and that you don't have to prove anything to anyone, it's easier to edit yourself on social media and avoid showing off... too much. :)

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    1. I completely agree with you. As the saying goes, haters gonna hate. There are some people who just don't like you even if you don't do or say anything. Those people that paint a happy picture thru ostentatious display of material possessions are sometimes the loneliest.

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  3. I love this post. I love to watch... not only because I am a "haul-addict" and love watching them, but I love to see what others get because it gives me an idea if I want it too. No matter what we do in life... people will never understand our intentions. I love to show because I love to shop - I don't consider it bragging... but to each his own I guess.

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    1. I agree. Showing and watching goes hand in hand. I love to watch too but I get turned off easily by people who have nothing but praises for themselves.

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  4. I agree with Nidia I don't know anyone personally that owns something so expensive ! I really enjoyed this more kind of one on one conversation :)

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    1. Hi Betzy! Thanks for your comments. I also enjoy writing these kind of stuff.

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  5. Love hearing your thoughts on this! People generally want to put their most enviable foot forward on the internet (be it by showing expensive things, fancy travel photos, or thousands of shots from their wedding). I tend to feel less bothered by the material things, as I've made peace with the fact that I can't (and likely won't) be a customer of luxury brands. The engagement and wedding photos can be much more forceful in pushing specific cultural values and metrics for happiness and success, I think. Either way, though, they're just photos ... they don't paint a fuller picture of financial stability or happiness.

    www.beautyloon.com

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    1. Hi Erin. First, thanks much for your insightful comments! This inspires to write more real-life dilemma or issues everyone can relate with. Growing up, my grandpa used to tell me that the richest people aren't the happiest. I know some people (friends to be specific) who love to shout out their "perfect" relationship and/or lifestyle yet keep an obscure amount of skeletons in the closet. They're the type I avoid or hide from my feed ;-)

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  6. I dont think it's anything wrong with being proud and showing and sharing. I think it becomes 'showing off' when the audience is jealous or mean spirited. I do agree if you feel like someone is showing off, simply disconnect from that person.

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    1. Yep, as the saying goes "haters gonna hate". It's ironic that some people, despite all the hatred, still want to see/watch you.

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  7. I love showing what I have. Showing off is another thing altogether!

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    1. It's a thin line, to be honest. I like to show and watch too.

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  8. I have shown my LV bags before, but I had a requested handbag post wayyyyy back when lol I LOVE to watch videos on other peoples hauls, stash, closets... everything. I don't feel jealous but I do get inspired in what I want to save for in the future in terms of fashion and design. I feel so bad when these YouTube girls post their closets because so many readers request it then they get such rude comments. They bust their butts and can spend their money however they want. I'd have a Chanel bag in every color if I could (one is a major goal haha I'm dreaminggg).

    I think as long as people aren't going, "look what I have omg it was soooo expensive and most of you will never afford it but isn't it fabulous" or being outright rude about it then showing your stuff is totally okay and I hope they don't quit just because people drank too much haterade (that word cracks me up).

    And, exactly, if it's not what you want to see or hear about - delete them and don't watch/look. If you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all. That's what our mommas taught us in the 80's.

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    1. I agree w/ you 100%. I think when you expose yourself in social media, prepare to have elephant skin and learn to ignore rude comments. It's tough but it comes with the territory. I think what separates a "sincere and fun showing" from downright arrogant "showing off" is the way it is conveyed. Reputation is not built overnight. Sadly, I know people who were born with it, haha!

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  9. I'm such a haul addict myself. I love watching them! I'm totally guilty of snapping what I get in the mail & putting it up on IG!

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    1. We are all guilty at some point. We like to show and watch.

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  10. Love this post! Yeah I always find it interesting to see what people share online. I always think hard about what I share when it's personal.

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    1. I agree. It's hard to control especially if you utilize social media heavily. I also try to be sensitive with what's going on, say in light of calamities and hunger, it's insensitive to post your material acquisitions. Take a break, help out, and count your blessings.

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  11. Sometimes I think about having two or three Facebook accounts: One for everyone, one for business/work relations, and another for people I know would be happy for me, no matter what I posted. I say this because I think we all have public selves and private selves, and there are things that I wouldn't mind showing off from time to time, but wouldn't want to seem obnoxious with, say, someone I barely know but am Facebook friends with. There's a fine line.

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    1. Hello Daisy :-) I maintain two FB, one personal, one for general public to support my blog. But you know what, even on my personal FB, I try to selectively share. If there are things I really really want to share but feel like some will feel alienated, I just inbox those people who will be genuinely happy for me.

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  12. I can usually tell by the way it's worded which they are going for, and I usually tend to ignore the show off type

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    1. Same here. These people earned reputation w/ the way they talk.

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  13. I really don't like it when beauty bloggers post on social media what they get in samples or gifts from brands, unless they are doing it in a way that says, hey, look at this new collection coming, or hey, which one do you like the looks of best?! I see so many who are just posting pictures of their mail and gifts and thanking the brand by tagging them and I think that just perpetuates the idea that beauty blogging is great for the "free stuff." It's so much more than that!!! Not quite what you're talking about, LOL but my pet peeve!

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    1. I get what you mean. We blog because we want to share our passion. I love to write and express my opinion on all things beauty, etc. Sadly, there are bloggers who paint a bad rep for pimping brands in exchange of free stuff. For one, I can't stomach those who write "sponsor me for this xxx amount or xxx products and I'll promote your brand this xxx much or say "pay for my meal and accommodation and I'll take pic for my instagram followers. How lowly is that? Sheez!

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  14. Man there are some friends of mine that I have to hide from my feed because their status updates are RIDICULOUS. I don't need to know EVERY SINGLE THING you have or do or eat!

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  15. Well-said, Kath, I love that you are sharing your personal feelings on a subject other than beauty products. I like when people brag about their cars, hauls, gifts, but to a certain extent.

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    1. Mahalo Anastasia. It's a breather for me too because it can get boring and echolalic talking the same shizzz, haha!

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  16. Great post, I totally agree. It makes me nuts when people flaunt their stuff. I'm sure a lot of people would think I'm greedy for the amount of beauty products I have, but I'm always ready to share with others!

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    1. Thank you Justina. I think at the end of the day, for as long as we don't step on another person's shoe, we are entitled to do what we feel like doing. But see, we can't control people's reaction so que sera sera.

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  17. Great post, and I totally agree. I unfriended someone from highschool recently because her whole timeline was filled with check-ins at Harvard University where she is pursuing her masters. Every post is "On my way to Harvard!" or "Working hard at ______ class at Harvard!"

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